Family-integrated Worship

Our church is an intentionally family-integrated church. We are not the only church that utilizes this model, however, family-integrated churches aren’t as common (particularly in our local communities). There are a few things that distinguish a family-integrated church:

• Families Worship Together—one of the first aspects of a family-integrated church that people notice is the presence of babies and small children in the worship services. We believe that the best place for a child to learn about the Bible is in the gathered assembly of God’s people, through the regular preaching and teaching ministry of the church, and within the home itself. We like having children in our services and have grown accustomed to their presence. Additionally, as children regularly attend worship services at our church (and as their parents train them to participate in the worship services), the children grow accustomed to being a part of the worship services. No one will stop you at the door if you try to enter our worship services with your children. Now, in our church, we do offer some childcare support for families—children ages 1-5 are welcome to spend the sermon portion of the service in the Fellowship Hall with a trained and background checked volunteer (this is completely at the parent’s discretion—parents are welcome to keep their children in the service). Please know that no curriculum is provided for childcare, it is purely childcare.

• Few Elements of Systematic Age Segregation—family-integrated churches don’t typically have a lot of programs for different age groups. In our local church, we offer one regularly scheduled time that includes an age segregated element—our Discipleship Groups—and we have one annual event that is age segregated—Vacation Bible School. Otherwise, we believe the children should learn, grow, and worship with their parents as part of whole body of Christ.

• A word of encouragement to families with young children—we understand that it can be difficult to have your children in the worship services of the church. We know that children can be a handful, that they squirm, and that they’re often loud at inopportune times. Please don’t fret and don’t be embarrassed. If your children have a day when they’re a bit more difficult to handle than usual (e.g., that ill-timed tantrum), please feel free to take your child to the Fellowship Hall where our services are streamed onto the TVs. If your children aren’t within the age frame for our childcare program, please remain with your child until he calms down and then rejoin us in the Auditorium. In addition, here is some friendly advice that could help you as you train your children to participate in worship with us:

  • Sit toward the front where it is easier for your little ones to see and hear what’s going on. Encourage them to sit in their seats and pay attention as much as they can. If all they see during the service are the seats in front of them or the heads in front of them, they won’t have much interest in what’s going on during the service.

  • Quietly explain the parts of the service and the actions of the pastors as they lead the service. Encourage your children to sing the hymns, pray, and voice the responses. Children learn behavior by copying you. (In addition, the Order of Service for every worship service is posted on our Facebook page two days before that service. This is intended for those attending to learn the songs in advance (including parents teaching their children), to reflect on the readings prior to the service, and to read the sermon text before the service.

  • If you have to leave the service with your child, feel free to do so, but again, please come back as soon as possible.

  • Remember that the way we welcome children in church directly affects the way they respond to the church, to God, and to one another. If we don’t train our children to participate in the regular gathering of God’s people when they’re young, they won’t want to participate when they’re older. If we don’t encourage our children to sing, to respond, to read, and to be a part of the congregation, they won’t want to when they’re older.

  • Let your children know that they are welcome to participate in our worship as a church, but be clear with them concerning what your expectations are for them and be consistent with those expectations.

• An additional word about family-integrated churches—family-integrated churches choose to be family-integrated for multiple reasons. Occasionally, the reasoning is purely pragmatic (e.g., they don’t have enough adult volunteers to be age segregated). In the case of most Reformed Baptist churches who practice family-integration, there are two primary reasons: (1) the regulative principle of worship dictates that during worship services we don’t do anything that the Bible doesn’t prescribe (i.e., the Bible nowhere commands nor suggests the removal of young children from the congregation during worship); and (2) there are many instances in which age segregated churches have done far more harm than good (e.g., think of how many former children (now adults) that you know of that attended all of a church’s children and youth ministries and then abandoned the local church afterwards because the regular worship of the congregation wasn’t like their children and youth ministries). Please be assured that family-integrated worship wasn’t invented by our church nor is it a new movement amongst churches. Rather, family-integrated worship was normal in all churches until modern-day church growth movements insisted that children ought not be with the adults during worship (essentially a succumbing to apparent pragmatism). Family-integrated worship is a return to the New Testament’s pattern of families worshiping together.

Did we skip the altar call/invitation?

Yes, we absolutely did! While we would never say that true conversion and true spiritual decisions weren’t made as the result of altar calls and invitations in local churches, we would say that there have been several false professions of faith, people thinking that they’ve been saved multiple times, and people making spiritual decisions simply because of a manipulative altar call or invitation.

At Grace Reformed Baptist Church, we want to see people make spiritual decisions and life-changing decisions that aren’t manipulated—individuals need to make spiritual decisions between them and God.

In addition, when it comes to joining our church—you won’t see people walking the aisle during an altar call to sign a card to join our church. Our membership process is intentionally longer because we want all our church members to understand what our church believers and be committed to our local church.

Do we partake in the Lord’s Supper weekly?

Yes, we partake in the Lord’s Supper weekly intentionally. We believe that the New Testament gives the pattern for a weekly partaking of the Lord’s Supper—we see God’s people in the New Testament partaking in the Lord’s Supper every time they gather for worship, why wouldn’t we? Please know that our view of the Lord’s Supper is expressed in the London Baptist Confession of Faith—we do not believe that the elements are the physical body and blood of Jesus Christ, but rather, His spiritual presence is with His people as they remember His willingness to atone for the sins of His people on the cross. We welcome all who have genuinely repented of their sins and follow Jesus Christ to partake with us (parents are asked to determine whether their children are ready to participate with us).

Why is there no special music?

As a Reformed Baptist church, we adhere to the regulative principle of worship, which means that we do not do anything during the regularly scheduled worship services of our church that isn’t prescribed in Scripture. In Scripture, musical worship is always done congregationally (i.e., there is no special music in the Bible during the corporate gathering of God’s people, it’s always congregational singing). Thus, we do not allow small groups, soloists, or choirs to sing apart from the congregation. We do, however, allow our musical worship team to aid our congregation in musical worship (i.e., the congregation sings with the team).

Why do you not pass an offering plate?

We’ve chosen not to pass offering plates in an effort to better reflect giving in the New Testament. While we wholeheartedly affirm that giving financially to the local church is an act of worship towards God and while we fully teach that every believer ought to give to a local church as an act of worship, we’re also convinced that the passing of offering plates exists for pragmatic reasons rather than biblical reasons. We believe that the passing of offering plates does more to guilt people into giving or to cause people to give narcissistically rather than allowing people to give out of the outflowing of their hearts. So, no, we don’t pass offering plates, but we still encourage and exhort giving as an act of worship in our church. So much so, that we offer several different ways for people to do so.